秋分 [5] / [6]
"Honey, please, it really isn't ('but it is,' a small voice in his head interrupted him as he spoke to Cynthia, 'it's exactly . . . ') what it looks like."
She looked at him, staring daggers into him and said,
"Go! Go to your whore, and leave me be."
"Please, just listen―"
"No!” she screamed, then more calmly, said,
"No, just go. We'll talk about this tomorrow."
Alexander tried to reassure her, but in vain,
"We're going to be at the office. Nothing's going to happen between us, I plan to come back to―"
"Then you're sleeping on the goddamn couch,"
she yelled, as she pushed him out of the room and slammed the door.
As he grabbed his coat, and walked toward the front door, he could hear her in the bedroom. She was sobbing. He couldn't leave for awhile. He hated this situation to death. Leaving his wife because of this shitty case; it was so meaningless, and he wasn't even sure whether Violet's story was true or not. Of course, it was his duty to find out the truth. He regretted everything. He regretted sleeping with Violet under the influence of alcohol, for taking this case from the first. He should have ignored Violet completely. He didn't anticipate Violet would act in such a nasty way.
He tried to start the car, but he just didn't have the strength in his hand. He put the keys down. He looked at the window of their room where Cynthia now was. This is wrong, he thought. No matter how much attention Violet's case was now getting from the station, that should not pull his focus away from Cynthia. He got out of the car, and went back inside the house again. Cynthia was sitting on the bed in the room. He knelt down in front of her feet.
"Forgive me Cynthia. That night, Violet kept imploring me to drink with her for one last time, and I lost my reason under the alcohol's effects . . . That was the only time, I swear. I kicked her out right after that. It was not related to love at all. I know it's all ridiculous and I should not have done that. I don't know how to express the depth of my regret."
Cynthia still remained silent. But she was not crying anymore.
"Will you forgive me? You're the only one I love. You know that."
Finally Cynthia opened her mouth and said,
"I know. I know that and I can feel you love me. Once Violet tells you the whole story, we can dig into her real motives."
"What do you mean?"
Alexander felt touched and also puzzled.
"To be honest, I have doubts about her story,”
Cynthia's expression was normal again and much more like herself.