Intense Cold

大寒 [10] / [13]

Cynthia shook her head.

"Apparently there was no background check done. She was recommended by a man―the owner never met him before, and can't remember him giving a name―and she decided to take Sarah on.”

"How could she be so ignorant as to take the word of a stranger?”

said Alexander, irritated.

"Because that stranger offered her a large sum of money. I spoke to her briefly on the phone, and we're supposed to be meeting later on tonight at the station."

After a moment's pause, Alexander said,

"Can’t you deal with the case?”

“If I could, I would. But that case is not under my department’s jurisdiction. It’s being processed, so all you have to focus on is recovery,"

she said, feeling sorry for him.

Alexander closed his eyes. He felt exhausted by everything. All those criminal cases happening everyday, every minute, no matter how they struggled to stop them.

"I want to quit everything."

Cynthia was a little shaken by this statement,

"What do you mean?"

"I'm too tired of all of this. Hadn't you known that I haven't felt suited to this job for awhile?"

"Alex, don't say that. You're just too exhausted and need rest, that's all.”

"No, that's not all. Every night when I go to sleep, I see the faces of the kids we failed to save, even of the people who abused them! I'm done. I can't do this anymore,"

said Alexander, laying his head back on the pillow.

He looked tired, and she knew that was why he said what he said. Alexander was a strong man, but even the most stoic of men have a breaking point, and she could see he was close to his.

"We can talk about that later,"

said Cynthia with understanding,

"but how about we find the woman who tried to kill you before you turn in your badge and gun, deal?"

"I just don't want to be thrust into the middle of this case, you know what I mean? I don't want to put in the effort. I've already said all I have to say about that. Also, it doesn't matter who she is anymore."

She said nothing. Alexander kept speaking.

"Once I get out of the hospital, I will seriously consider whether I want to keep doing this job or not."

Cynthia spoke up after a moment's silence,

"I know you went through a traumatic experience, but―"

"No, it's not that," he interrupted,

"It's everything! I've felt this way for years, but I kept it to myself! And why? Because I wanted to do my duty. No more! This week's been hell, for a lot of reasons I don’t want to get into, but those reasons, including almost dying, aren't why I want to leave - they're just the needle that broke the camel's back."