I want to be embarrassed.
We South Koreans don’t feel awkward about foreigners. However, when it comes to acceptance, it’s different. We think we’re open to anyone, yet perhaps we are not.
I can say this because I also thought I was very open but was not. As a Korean, it felt natural to assume that Korean citizens should be ethnically Korean; whose father and mother are Korean.
Even though I thought that the US should accept me as a citizen, I did’t believe Korea should accept non-Koreans as our citizens. How arrogant and selfish! I have to confess my narrow-mindedness and self-centeredness. Because only after the confession and confrontation can I grow and mature.
I confess that I once thought it was uncomfortable to see non-Koreans as Koreans, yet I want to be comfortably afraid to the idea of new Koreans. Since we’re also new Koreans, indebted to our ancestors’ endeavors.
Of course, it will not feel natural at first.
Of course, there are so many factors that hae led us to accept only Koreans as our family, such as geogarphy, history, and culture.
Moreover, there are so many things to be resolved. On the other hand, it’s time to accept our vulnerability and start to open our hearts.
I do not say that all Koreans are arrogant.
I say that I was arrogant and I want to start truly taking care of others, not only myself. Maturity comes only after we deeply love others.
It is embarrassing to open my hearts, but if my embarrassment can help at least one person to feel more accepted, I want to be embarrassed.