D 50 / hope

자연스러운 수정 버전:

All of a sudden, I felt like writing about what I went through in my diary.

I’ve been staying at my mom’s house for the past two days.

My mom and I took a walk and talked about our family plans for maybe an hour and a half.

That’s when it hit me — we’ve been doing our best for the sake of our household, including my younger sister.

Of course, to succeed in life, we have to try even harder than before.

Even so, we found hope — the hope that we can be happy together in the future.

So, let’s keep it up together.

(I wish our house would be sold to a buyer as soon as possible.)

⸻

문장별 피드백 (한국어 설명)

1. All of a sudden, I wanna write what I went through in my diary.

• 자연스럽게 고치면:

All of a sudden, I felt like writing about what I went through in my diary.

• “wanna”는 너무 캐주얼하고 일기 문장에는 felt like ~ing이 더 어울립니다.

⸻

2. I’ve stayed my mother’s house for 2 days.

• stayed 장소 앞에는 보통 staying at 사용

• I’ve been staying at my mom’s house for the past two days.

⸻

3. I and my mom took a walk…

• I and my mom 어순이 어색

• My mom and I가 올바른 순서예요

⸻

4. …talked about plans of household…

• plans of household 어색한 표현

• talked about our family plans 또는 plans for our household

⸻

5. we’ve tried to do for our household include my younger sister.

• 문법 어색함

• we’ve been doing our best for the sake of our household, including my younger sister.

⸻

6. To succeed in our life, we should try to harder than past.

• try to harder try harder (부사)

• than past than before가 더 자연스러움

• we have to try even harder than before.

⸻

7. Even though, we could find the hope…

• Even though 여기선 문장 연결이 어색

• Even so, Still, 또는 But이 자연스러움

• we found hope — the hope that… 표현 개선

⸻

8. I wish our house was sold by buyer as soon as possible.

• 더 자연스럽게:

I wish our house would be sold to a buyer as soon as possible.