How do you celebrate
your birthday?
Today’s Topic
How do you celebrate your birthday? State the most memorable birthday you have ever had.
<내가 쓴 글>
The most memorable birthday I have ever had is my 60 years birthday. My friend invited us to her house in United States. Her husband asked "What do you want for your 60 years birthday?" She answered "I want to stay at home for 20 days with my high school alumnus." He said "Yes!" So she invited us, 17 members that were choir at high school. She missed us so much because she left to the United States as soon as she graduated high school. We sang songs at her church as we did in our high school as a choir. She arranged it to feel as she was at high school. We had special time for almost 3 months before going to the United States to practice songs once a week. When we sang songs we felt that we were high school girls. We forgot all of our age. Her house was so big that all of us, 17 members could stay altogether. It was great. We ate together, practice songs, talked and laughed so much every night. We returned to the time when we were teen girls. There were so many stories we could memorize together.
<첨삭되어 온 글>
The most memorable birthday I have ever had is my 60 years (60th) birthday. My friend invited us to her house in (the) United States. Her husband asked(,) "What do you want for your 60 years (60th) birthday?" She answered(,) "I want to stay at home for 20 days with my (fellow) high school alumnus (alumni)." He said(,) "Yes!" So she invited us, 17 members that were (of the) choir at (in) high school. She missed us so much because she left to (for) the United States as soon as she graduated (from) high school. We sang songs at her church(,) as we did in our high school as a choir. She arranged it to feel as she was at (in) high school. We had special time for almost 3 (three) months before going to the United States to practice songs once a week. When we sang songs(,) we felt that we were high school girls. We (all) forgot all of(x) our age. Her house was so big that all of us, 17 members(,) could stay altogether. It was great. We ate together, practice (practiced) songs, talked(,) and laughed so much every night. We returned to the time when we were teen girls. There were so many stories we could memorize (remember) together.
<내가 기억해야 할 것들>
1. The most memorable birthday I have ever had is my 60 years (60th) birthday.
60살 생일이라기보다 60번째 생일이니까 60th birthday라고 해야 하는구나.
2. My friend invited us to her house in (the) United States.
미국을 말할 때 the를 붙여야 한다. in the United States.
3. Her husband asked(,) "What do you want for your 60 years (60th) birthday?"
따옴표 앞에 반드시 콤마
4. She answered(,) "I want to stay at home for 20 days with my (fellow) high school alumnus (alumni)."
동창 단수는 alumnus 복수는 alumni
여고시절 동창들에 fellow를 붙여야 하는구나.
요걸 아예 외우자. my fellow high school alumni
5. So she invited us, 17 members that were (of the) choir at (in) high school.
고교시절 합창단이었던 17명이라고 that이라는 관계대명사를 써서 문장을 만들었는데 그렇게 쓰는 거 아닌가 보다. 그냥 합창단의 17명을 초대했다고 했네. 고등학교는 at가 아니라 in을 써야 하는구나.
6. She missed us so much because she left to (for) the United States as soon as she graduated (from) high school.
미국으로 떠난 거 to 가 아니라 for를 써야 하는구나. she left for the United States...
졸업하다 그냥 뒤에 학교 쓰는 게 아니라 반드시 from 써줄 것. graduated from high school.
7. We sang songs at her church(,) as we did in our high school as a choir.
as 앞에 콤마 쓸 것.
8. We had special time for almost 3 (three) months before going to the United States to practice songs once a week.
이거 전에 했던 건데. 숫자 9 까지는 반드시 알파벳으로 써줄 것. 그러니까 3 months 가 아니라 반드시 three months가 되어야 한다.
9. When we sang songs(,) we felt that we were high school girls.
두 개의 문장일 때, 반드시 콤마 찍어주자.
10. We (all) forgot all of(x) our age.
우리 모두는 나이를 잊었다. 아하 요렇게. We all forgot our age.
11. Her house was so big that all of us, 17 members(,) could stay altogether.
콤마를 쓰려면 양쪽에 넣어서 그게 그냥 설명임을 나타내야 한다. 한쪽에만 쓰면 안 된다.
... all of us, 17 members, could stay...
12. We ate together, practice (practiced) songs, talked(,) and laughed so much every night.
시제를 맞춘다 하면서도 여차하면 이렇게 실수를 한다. ate 그다음은 practiced 과거가 되어야지. 그리고 콤마 콤마 문장 마지막 and 앞에도 콤마를 찍어야 한다.... talked, and... 요케.
13. There were so many stories we could memorize (remember) together.
오홋. 추억은 무조건 메모리 어쩌고 일 것만 같아 굳이 동사형을 찾아 memorize를 썼는데 간단히 remember라고 해도 되는구나. 하하. 괜히 고생했네.
<그리고 딸려온 특별 멘트>
Good day! Thank you for completing the writing activity. We are glad to read a fascinating essay. Despite some corrections, we are pleased with your writing progress. To enhance your writing, try discussing points from different perspectives. We look forward to reading your next essay. :)
perspectives 관점, 시각.
호홋 매력적 에세이라고 라. 다음 글을 기다린다고라~ 하하 칭찬엔 그저 헤벌레~ 하하
[tips]
Rules in Writing Numbers
General Rule: Spell out whole numbers (as well as ordinal numbers) 0-9 and use figures for numbers 10 and above (examples: zero, one man, five years, 10 boxes, 96 people, 104 books, ninth floor, 15th floor).
figures 수치
ordinal 서수
아, 이거 전에 지적받았던 것. 기억하자. 서수도 마찬가지로 9까지는 반드시 숫자 전체 스펠링을 써줘야 한다. 10 이상은 숫자로 쓰는 게 가능하다. 기억하자. zero, one man, five years, 10 boxes, 96 people, 104 books, ninth floor, 15th floor
Exceptions to the General Rule in Writing Numbers:
For age and numbers with units of measurements, we use numerals.
numerals 숫자
아하 예외가 있는데 나이를 쓸 때와 단위가 들어갈 때는 9까지라도 숫자로 쓰는구나.
Examples:
* 5 centimeters (unit of measurement)
* 9 years old (age)
* 1 dollar/$1, 3 pesos, 5 yen, etc. (currency)
* 1 o'clock in the afternoon, 3 PM, etc. (time)
NOTE: If the number is a part of a proper noun, or a bus number, station number, something that doesn't represent a quantity of a noun, it's okay to use numerals. Example: "It took me five minutes to reach exit number 6/six." (correct)
버스 번호라든가 역 번호 그렇게 수량을 나타내는 게 아닐 때는 9 이하라도 숫자를 쓰는 게 가능하다. 오케이. 그런 경우 아니고는 무조건 9까지는 알파벳으로 스펠링을 모두 써줘야만 한다. 꼭 기억하자.
<첨삭받은 대로 고쳐 쓴 글>
The most memorable birthday I have ever had is my 60th birthday. My friend invited us to her house in the United States. Her husband asked, "What do you want for your 60th birthday?" She answered, "I want to stay at home for 20 days with my fellow high school alumni." He said, "Yes!" So she invited us, 17 members of the choir in high school. She missed us so much because she left for the United States as soon as she graduated from high school. We sang songs at her church, as we did in our high school as a choir. She arranged it to feel as she was in high school. We had special time for almost three months before going to the United States to practice songs once a week. When we sang songs, we felt that we were high school girls. We all forgot our age. Her house was so big that all of us, 17 members, could stay altogether. It was great. We ate together, practiced songs, talked, and laughed so much every night. We returned to the time when we were teen girls. There were so many stories we could remember together.
(사진: 친구 H)