Loneliness

November 19, 2023

As usual, I turn on my TV to the max,

Because without it, there is pitch black silence;

Only with the booming sound, I can relax. 

I come from a big family, with two sisters and a brother.

But most of the time, I have no one to call.

We all live our lives without wanting no bother. 

Here and there, I would think about how they are.

But most of the time, I am in my own zone. 

Since we live away, with two time zones afar. 

My mother would sometimes call, just to say hi.

But I know in truth that she doesn’t really care. 

We say our automatic lines and say our byes. 

Do I have someone I can confront in honesty?

Although I am a wife and a mother already, 

I know that I am alone subconsciously. 

I fear that soon I will not be able to hold on.

Everyday is a struggle, a battle for sanity. 

I fear the end has come and soon I will be done. 

And if I die, will there be anyone who would cry?

I fear that perhaps no one would really care. 

That I will be left alone yet again in my sad goodbye.