Love is ALL?

The Black Skirts - Love Is All

There are spoilers for the movie Marriage Story in this text.

Revisiting the Meaning of Love

Love is an essential element in modern society. How far are we willing to go for our loved ones? To what extent can love be allowed? These are endless themes that humanity has long explored. Just as we cannot learn everything from our parents, the same applies to love. Who teaches us about love, and with whom should we experience it? Fortunately, in today’s world, there is no need to worry—we are surrounded by films, dramas, novels, and the stories of those around us. In this essay, I want to discuss the definition of love.

1. A Case in Film

The film Marriage Story portrays the divorce process of Charlie, a theater director and father, and Nicole, an actress and mother. As they navigate their ideals and reality, they repeatedly clash and reconcile. In the early scenes, they attend marriage counseling, where they are asked to read letters about what they love about each other. However, they ultimately fail to read them. At that moment, I thought, They are still married, so they haven't completely fallen apart yet.

However, when Nicole hires a divorce lawyer, the situation shifts from a mere separation to a full-fledged legal battle. Charlie, realizing this too late, also hires a lawyer, and the conflict intensifies—both emotionally and legally. As they fight for custody of their child, Henry, Charlie finds himself at a disadvantage despite being a good father. In one particular scene, he accidentally cuts his arm and attempts to hide it in front of the custody evaluator. However, he ends up bleeding heavily, symbolizing the difficulties he faces in taking on full parental responsibility alone.

The film’s highlight is a scene where their emotions reach a breaking point. Charlie and Nicole explode with anger, hurling hurtful words at each other. However, after releasing his fury, Charlie is overwhelmed by his own words, collapsing into tears. Nicole, despite their fight, comforts him. In the end, they opt for a mutual divorce and go their separate ways.

In the final scene, Henry stumbles upon the letter Nicole had written about Charlie and asks him to read it aloud. Charlie reads it in a sorrowful voice, while Nicole secretly watches from behind, shedding tears. They still love each other, yet they can no longer be together.

2. Personal Experience

In a past relationship, I endured my partner’s repeated mistakes, believing she was irreplaceable. Even when my pride was crushed, I thought love was something worth preserving. Some say that unhealthy relationships should be ended, but I didn’t want to give up. However, in the end, I could no longer bear the weight and chose to walk away.

Later, through conversations with friends, I realized how irrational my past actions had been. I thought I was compromising for the sake of the relationship, but in reality, I was avoiding my true emotions rather than expressing them. I believed in an idealized version of love and hoped to improve the relationship even if I couldn't completely "save" it. But reality didn’t work that way. I believed love required constant communication and devotion, treating sacrifice as a given.

Yet, in the end, I crumbled. I now see that the moment Charlie and Nicole screamed at each other was their final chance at reconciliation. Even in my own breakup, I let go of my last bit of pride and begged to fix the relationship. But she refused to talk, and in that instant, all the emotions I had built up shattered. After the breakup, she eventually apologized, but by then, my anger had taken root too deeply to offer forgiveness.

For months, I struggled to sleep, consumed by resentment. I didn’t want to rely on others, so I kept everything to myself. I didn’t seek counseling—I just buried myself in studying and working out. The hardest part was accepting that even when you make the right choice, you still have to endure pain. Now, rather than chasing love, I seek wisdom. To me, wisdom is not just knowledge but a blend of insight, patience, creativity, and warmth.

3. Conclusion

Through these experiences, I have come to realize that love is not just an emotion—it holds the power to heal and destroy, to comfort and wound. Love plants the seeds of attachment and responsibility, shaping the course of our lives as those seeds grow. Passionate relationships can ultimately consume both partners, leading to a point where letting go becomes inevitable. Yet, in that process, we grow and become better versions of ourselves. Love is a tightrope walk between longing and restraint, a force of gravity that pulls us forward through the passage of time.

I hope you are happy. Thank you for reading my writing.