What drives you crazy?
Tell me about your pet peeves.
Today’s Topic
What drives you crazy? Tell me about your pet peeves.
1. 내가 쓴 글
What drives me crazy? I'm trying to tell you about my pet peeves, but I can't find any pet peeves. Why? I always try to think about good things instead of pet peeves. Therefore I couldn't find what drives me crazy. I don't have such things to drive me crazy. If there is still something that drives me crazy, then I will avoid such a situation. I believe that there are so many good moods if I try to be happy, but if I try not to be happy, I mean if I feel sad, then there are so many sad things. So I always try to think about good things and happy things. It's a kind of habit to think whether I'm happy or gloomy. There is nothing to be changed in my surroundings, but according to my thinking, I become happy or unhappy. It's the same situation. So I try to be happy even though there are not so many happy things. Let's be a smile! And I smile. Then I become happy. It's not because of what I'm really happy, but because of what I smile, that I am happy.
2. 첨삭되어 온 글
What drives me crazy? I'm trying to tell you about my pet peeves, but I can't find any pet peeves. Why? I always try to think about good things instead of pet peeves. Therefore(,) I couldn't find what drives me crazy. I don't have such things to drive me crazy. If there is still something that drives me crazy, then I will avoid such a situation. I believe that there are so many good moods if I try to be happy, but if I try not to be happy, I mean if I feel sad, then there are(will be) so many sad things. So I always try to think about good things and happy things.
It's a kind of habit to think whether I'm happy or gloomy. There is nothing to be changed in my surroundings, but according to my thinking, I become happy or unhappy. It's the same situation. So I try to be happy even though there are not so many happy things. Let'sbe(make) a smile! And I smile. Then I become happy. It's not because of what I'm really happy, but because of what I smile, that I am happy.
3. 내가 기억해야 될 것들
1) Therefore 다음에 콤마 넣는다.
Therefore, I couldn't find what drives me crazy.
2) if 절 다음엔 미래형을 쓰자.
I believe that there are so many good moods if I try to be happy, but if I try not to be happy, I mean if I feel sad, then there will be so many sad things.
그런데 참 이상하다. 앞 구절에선 there are를 그대로 두고 뒤만 there will be로 고쳤을까? 난 시제는 한 문장 안에서는 같아야 한다는 것을 생각해서 모두 현재 시제를 썼는데 미래형으로 고쳐왔길래 아하 앞에 if절이 있으면 미래형을 쓰는구나라고 기억하기로 한다. 그런데 앞에는 if가 있는 데도 현재형 그대로 두고 뒤만 미래형으로 고친 것은 왜일까.
3) 웃다! 는 be smile 이 아니라 make a smile! 아하!
Let's make a smile!
4. 첨삭받은 대로 고쳐 쓴 글
What drives me crazy? I'm trying to tell you about my pet peeves, but I can't find any pet peeves. Why? I always try to think about good things instead of pet peeves. Therefore, I couldn't find what drives me crazy. I don't have such things to drive me crazy. If there is still something that drives me crazy, then I will avoid such a situation. I believe that there are so many good moods if I try to be happy, but if I try not to be happy, I mean if I feel sad, then there will be so many sad things. So I always try to think about good things and happy things.
It's a kind of habit to think whether I'm happy or gloomy. There is nothing to be changed in my surroundings, but according to my thinking, I become happy or unhappy. It's the same situation. So I try to be happy even though there are not so many happy things. Let's make a smile! And I smile. Then I become happy. It's not because of what I'm really happy, but because of what I smile, that I am happy.
5. 그리고 딸려온 내가 좋아하는 특별 멘트
Hello! Thanks for writing!
What an impressive essay! Beautiful words, almost flawless grammar, and coherent transition of ideas filled your writing. We are certainly pleased of your performance. One of the tips to improve your writing is think of another way that a certain passage or sentence could be written better, and edit it according to what you understand. Keep reaching your learning goals! ^^
오홋. 좋아라. 감동적인 에세이라네. 으하하하 좋아라아아아. 문법 틀린 것도 별로 없고 단어도 아름답고 생각을 풀어가는 게 논리 정연하고... 헤헤. 나의 글을 좋아한다고라. 여러 방법으로 표현해보라. 넵! 목표를 이룰 때까지 열심히 노력하게씀돠!!! 음하하하
coherent: 논리 정연한, 조리 있게 말하는
transition: 전이
coherent transition: 일관성 있는 전환
certain: 확실한, 틀림없는
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