내 생애, 아름다운 날들
Every sinlge moment is beautiful!
One of the most beautiful day of my life was the one on which I attained enlightenment by “Journey in Search of Myself.” The enlightenment made my attitude and perspective on my life more enjoyable, grateful, and simple. It was the last day of February, 2010.
Prior to that time, I had achieved quite a lot of things, such as getting a master’s degree, getting married, having my own house, keeping a stable job and a good position, and so on. I was a person of established reputation in my job field. However, I was absolutely exhausted with it all, especially my job. After graduating from my university, I had been running and running, looking ahead without looking backwards for twelve years. One day, I asked myself, for instance, for what and why am I working here? What is my goal in life? What do I want to do in the future, and so on. I couldn’t cleary find the answer to what was going on. Meanwhile, one of my colleagues recommended a program, titled “Journey in Search of Myself.” I just headed there without any more information. It was a mindfulness meditation program for five days and four nights.
At the beginning of the program, I couldn’t follow the instructor’s teachings. I struggled with my own worries, fears, anger, and regrets in my mind. I couldn’t even be in touch with my own breathing. To be aware of my breathing, I needed to make an effort. How foolish of me! As time passed, I could concentrate on my body, feelings, and perceptions. To breathe in, I just breathed in without any effort. When I was eating something, I could enjoy its’ natural taste. When I was walking around the meditation center, which was located in the beautiful, quiet forest, I could feel a gentle breeze and the beautiful sunshine and listen to the sounds of birds tweeting. I learned to breathe, to smile, to live with a free heart. Furthemore, it was a precious time to look back deeply throughout my whole life. I realized that I cannot exist by myself. I understood how numerous people and things-water, air, sun, soil-and all living things are helping me for my life. All the things are interconnected with me. As much as I received their help, I made up my mind to help others. After finishing the program, I participated in volunteer programs to make a society in which nature is beautiful, community is peaceful, and people are happy. I also started to study and practice mindfulness, meditation, and prayer to keep expanding my enlightenment.
My life has been changing from day to day, from year to year. Even seven years ago, it was inconceivable to me that I would live in the United States seven years later. Frankly, I don’t know how to change my future. However, I know exactly, every single day whether it is a good day or a bad day that makes up my whole life. I am solely responsible for my life. Secondly, I know that life is filled with suffering, obstacles, and challenges, but it is also filled with many wonders, such as the blue sky, the sunshine, and the smiling of a baby. They are within me and all around me, everywhere, anytime. Lastly, my happiness, joy, and peace are not in the past or future. They are in the here and now. I always appreciate everything around me, such as my society, my country, and the Earth. I’m always trying to help others and to share something I have. What a thankful and wonderful life!
